Respond to a joke by adding to it
When someone jokes, laugh, then add one small piece to the joke, like your own version of it. A bare “haha” is kind, and the joke stops there.
Get comfortable talking to people. Connsmitten is an app for building social confidence through short lessons and practice conversations, with feedback from your coach.
Laugh, then add
When someone jokes, laugh, then add one small piece to it.
When someone jokes, they’re inviting you to play along. Laugh so they know you liked it, then add one small piece: take their joke one step further, or say how the same thing goes for you. It doesn’t need to be clever. A bare “haha” is kind, and the joke stops there. Add a little and it keeps going.
Listen
“My to-do list is so long, it needs its own to-do list.”
Listen
Not this: Haha.
This: Ha! Mine still has stuff on it from last month.
When a coworker jokes about being on mute
Tuesday, a video call with a coworker
Listen
PaigeSorry, I was on mute. I just gave a whole speech to nobody.
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What would you say?
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Ha! Was it a good one? Take it from the top.
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No worries, I can hear you now. Go ahead.
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Ha! It happens.
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Build confidence for your next conversation. Take a two-minute lesson, then have your first practice conversation with Dan.
Listen to Dan open the conversation
Hey! How was your weekend?
Compare the two replies
“My to-do list is so long, it needs its own to-do list.”
Listen
Not this: Haha.
This: Ha! Mine still has stuff on it from last month.
Why does the second reply keep the joke going?
Listen
It laughs harder.
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It’s funnier than their joke.
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It laughs, then adds to their joke.
Listen
When a friend jokes about themselves
ZoeA whole year of Spanish, and all I can do is order a coffee.
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You: Ha! Yeah, languages are hard.
Does this reply keep the conversation going?
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Ends it
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Keeps it going
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When someone jokes about where they parked
WesI parked so far away, I should’ve packed a lunch.
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You: Ha! Text me when you make it back to your car.
Does this reply keep the conversation going?
Listen
Ends it
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Keeps it going
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When a friend jokes about their cooking
A friend’s place, just before dinner
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NadiaI followed the recipe exactly, and it looks nothing like the picture.
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Which reply keeps Nadia’s joke going?
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Ha! That’s nothing. You should see mine.
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No, it looks great!
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Ha! That’s how you know it’s homemade.
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When someone finds their sunglasses on their head
CalebI just spent ten minutes looking for my sunglasses. They were on my head.
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Laugh, then add to Caleb’s joke.
Listen
One way to reply
- React to what they saidHa! The one place you didn’t look.
- Add something about youI do that with my keys. They’re usually in my hand.
You laughed, then added your keys. Caleb knows it landed and has something to laugh back at.
Listen
Lines to leave out
- You should keep them in the same spot every time. Good advice for a problem Caleb was laughing about. Stay in the joke with him.
Listen
Woman’s voiceMan’s voice - You’re so funny. Nice to hear, and it closes the joke instead of adding to it.
Listen
Woman’s voiceMan’s voice
What the research found
Sharing a laugh made people feel more alike, and closer for it.
Your mission
Next time someone jokes with you, laugh, then add one small piece to their joke, and notice whether they add something back.
In the Connsmitten app
A practice conversation with Tom follows this lesson’s questions.
Build confidence for your next conversation. Take a two-minute lesson, then have your first practice conversation with Dan.
Listen to Dan open the conversation
Hey! How was your weekend?